Showing up is the whole battle
Whoever said “showing up is half the battle” probably never struggled with social anxiety.
Showing up to a social event isn’t half the battle.
It’s the whole thing.
Showing up is a battle with fear
Showing up means fighting fear.
The fear of being seen alone. Of being judged. Of being asked what you did over the weekend.
Showing up is a choice not to hide.
But when you make that choice, not only do you build confidence, you get a chance at something even better.
Everything after you show up is a bonus
A great thing happens when you show up.
More of yourself starts to come out. In a question you answer. In a shirt you wear. Or in a comment you don’t overthink.
That’s where opportunities appear.
It might feel awkward at the time. But nobody ever complained about deep conversations, new friendships, or progress at work.
Showing up is already a win. But the chance at countless opportunities is a fantastic bonus.
Pick a version of the battle you can win
You don’t need to go from zero to social butterfly overnight.
That’s an easy way to burn out.
Start with a version of the battle you can actually win.
There are four things you can do to make showing up easier. Pick one and focus on showing up consistently.
When it starts to feel manageable, increase the difficulty. Stay for longer. Have an impromptu conversation. Share more.
You’ll begin to notice a wonderful pattern.
Impossible events become hard. Hard events become manageable. Manageable events become easy.
You’re growing.
Count your wins after so you don’t erase them
After you show up, the second battle begins.
The urge to downplay your win and move on.
You’ll tell yourself it didn’t count. You’ll focus on the awkward moment, the wrinkled shirt, or the thing you should have said.
Just like that, your win disappears.
That’s why it’s so important to count your wins. Ask yourself:
- What fears did I overcome by showing up?
- What did it take for me to go?
- How many times did I avoid this before?
- How am I different from the version of me who stayed home?
- What opportunities did I notice once I was there?
You may have to read your answers a hundred times before they sink in. Be patient with yourself :)
When you count your wins, you’ll realize that you’ve more than beat your past self. That growth is motivation to keep going
Your Turn
Showing up is the whole battle. But when you win, you build confidence and get a chance at countless opportunities.
So pick your battle. Show up. And don’t forget to count your wins.
Love,
-T.O
P.S. I’m building a confidence game called Roadmap to help make this fun. If you’re curious, you can check it out here!
